My mother passed away just before dawn on Christmas Day morning. She fought a long hard battle with lung cancer and finally at 83 years old she slipped away with grace and surrounded by our love. On her last day, she whispered a question which were to be her last words to me. As she weakly held my hand, she said, “We sure had some good times, didn’t we?” I squeezed her hand as gently as I could and softly responded, “We sure did, Mom, we sure did!”
Three weeks after my mother’s funeral, while driving to work, I fell apart. The grieving was not to be pushed aside and the feelings were determined to be let out in a feeling free-for-all. The trigger, of course, was a song playing on the radio, “Live Like You Were Dying” by Tim McGraw. That song should be outlawed, I thought to myself, confirming I was not in the mood for an inspiring sad song. Then, to my utter surprise I found myself crying as I headed down the freeway. And I mean sobbing, those big, heaving, nose running, tears streaming down my face and chin sobs. I couldn’t stop crying until I pulled in the work parking ramp twenty minutes later. Thank goodness I had on waterproof makeup so I didn’t look like a hot mess when I walked into work.
The meltdown and song made me think about the loss of my mother and how I live my life. If I had to live each day like I was dying, like it was my last day, how would I live my life? Would I walk it as gracefully as my mother? Could I give up the worry about all the change? Would I just breathe, relax and stop fretting about all the things that might happen in the future? Give myself permission to be imperfect and release up all control to the universe? Do something that I’ve always wanted to do, without the mantle of fear holding me back? Maybe, just maybe, I could accept the dare to live differently.
So, I challenge all my chicas and blog readers to live each day in 2014 as it might be your last day.
Have some great times. Make some wonderful loving memories. Live a big life. Make it count! What would you do, where would you go and what fun would you have? Would you love more? Have delightfully indulgent fun? Would you give up unrealistic expectations of a loved one? Would you let go of the need to control? Would this be the year you finally let go and choose healthy? Would you still stress about what you think others think of you? Whatever your goal may be, make it one that resonates and inspires you.
My last day goals are simple.
I’m having fun. I’m letting go. I’m putting my shoulders back, sitting up straight and breathing into my heart. I’m letting go of all the fears, the don’t want to look bad, and the need for control. I’m releasing all to the universe to absorb and heal. I’m going to feel my feelings – good or bad. And, I’m going to look beautiful on my summer wedding day to match.com man!
These are my goals. Simple and complex at the same time. And, somehow, someway, I know my last day’s journey will be filled with joy and light.
So chicas, here are my Last Day wishes for you. I have only three wishes because they are big wishes!
- I wish you will create one goal for 2014 to live each like it is the last day. I would love it if you would please leave a comment in the comment section and share what your goal is. This could be so inspiring to other readers, and it would be wonderful to circle back to see the impact it had on your life.
- Be free, my chicas, live your life large and know that you are loved.
- And finally, I wish in living each day as if it were the last, life guarantees that at the real and true last day, you will be surrounded by love, light and joy, celebrating a life well lived. Then, you too can whisper - we sure had some good times, didn’t we!
With infinite love and gratitude,
In loving memory of Ila May Sealy, March 17, 1930 – December 25, 2013. Back in Dad’s arms, safe in God’s hands.